Dr. Laura Kastner PhD, a clinical psychologist and author, spoke with Lon Woodbury on Parenting Choices for Struggling Teens, a radio talk show hosted on L.A. Talk Radio, about raising children, getting from CALM to wise. CALM is an acronym for constructive steps a parent can take to establish self-control when confronted by a distraught teen. During the interview, she explained a variety of parental approaches based on a parent's strong self-regulation that worked remarkably well.
Lon Woodbury is the founder of Woodbury Reports and has worked with families and struggling teens since 1984. Besides his work as an Educational Consultant, he is a prolific writer, and his Parent Empowerment book series is available on amazon.com.
Regarding Dr. Laura Kastner
Dr. Laura Kastner has actually authored four incredible books on parenting: The Seven Year Stretch, The Launching Years, Getting to Calm, and Wise-Minded Parenting. She is a psychologist with her own private practice, and also a clinical instructor, with positions in a large number of departments, namely Psychology, Psychiatry and the Sociology departments at the University of Washington.
The Secret of Parenting Children, Getting from CALM to WISE
Among the most essential parenting skills necessary in taking care of kids is learning to be sensible under pressure, said Dr. Kastner, who believes in teaching parents self-control. This is necessary because when a teen faces their mother or father, the situation normally explodes into a shouting match. Moms and dads must find out how maintain their own self-control to ensure that they can begin to model self-control for their teens.
CALM, she clarified, is an acronym for the steps a parent could use for self-control when in conflict with their adolescent. C is for cool down and focus on your breathing; A is for assessing your choices in the moment; L is for listening closely with compassion; and M is mapping your strategy.
In discussing why most teens behave in such a volatile way, the professor explained that at around the age of thirteen, kids were in the midst of a biological mental change that was hard wired through evolution. Their brains resembled a 'website that was under construction;' in other words, they were beginning the long climb to adulthood and independent living. How teenagers responded to this biological change really depended entirely on their personality. Some were quiet; some looked for trouble and danger; and others were prone to depression. Parents needed to quit acting from their own emotional states, and focus on creating a calm, clear, and assertive parenting style.
Lon Woodbury is the founder of Woodbury Reports and has worked with families and struggling teens since 1984. Besides his work as an Educational Consultant, he is a prolific writer, and his Parent Empowerment book series is available on amazon.com.
Regarding Dr. Laura Kastner
Dr. Laura Kastner has actually authored four incredible books on parenting: The Seven Year Stretch, The Launching Years, Getting to Calm, and Wise-Minded Parenting. She is a psychologist with her own private practice, and also a clinical instructor, with positions in a large number of departments, namely Psychology, Psychiatry and the Sociology departments at the University of Washington.
The Secret of Parenting Children, Getting from CALM to WISE
Among the most essential parenting skills necessary in taking care of kids is learning to be sensible under pressure, said Dr. Kastner, who believes in teaching parents self-control. This is necessary because when a teen faces their mother or father, the situation normally explodes into a shouting match. Moms and dads must find out how maintain their own self-control to ensure that they can begin to model self-control for their teens.
CALM, she clarified, is an acronym for the steps a parent could use for self-control when in conflict with their adolescent. C is for cool down and focus on your breathing; A is for assessing your choices in the moment; L is for listening closely with compassion; and M is mapping your strategy.
In discussing why most teens behave in such a volatile way, the professor explained that at around the age of thirteen, kids were in the midst of a biological mental change that was hard wired through evolution. Their brains resembled a 'website that was under construction;' in other words, they were beginning the long climb to adulthood and independent living. How teenagers responded to this biological change really depended entirely on their personality. Some were quiet; some looked for trouble and danger; and others were prone to depression. Parents needed to quit acting from their own emotional states, and focus on creating a calm, clear, and assertive parenting style.
About the Author:
Lon Woodbury, the founder of Struggling Teens, has recorded the entire interview on his weekly L.A. Talk Radio show for people to listen to at their convenience.
